★ Earth is ghetto★ 8 billion roommates, zero security deposit★ 1 in 3 households crushed by housing costs★ One hospital bill from bankruptcy★ Income inequality: above 0.40 and climbing★ Life expectancy: don't get too attached★ Air quality: questionable★ Political polarization: surging★ Homicide rates: location-dependent★ Now scoring 9 metrics — Gini coefficient added★ Recommendation: do not move in

Country Overview

Country Dossier

Kazakhstan

Cooked Index
24/ 100
Global Rank
45/ 72
45th Most Cooked
Top 3 Pain Points
  • Homicide rate#23
  • Life expectancy#24
  • Air pollution (PM2.5)#27
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Overview

Out of 72 countries, Kazakhstan sits at #45 — #45 Most Cooked. Three departments are doing the heavy lifting here: political institutions (political polarization beats 36% of the field, just not in a good way), housing policy (housing cost burden, 39th percentile), and public health policy bringing up the rear. Different agencies, same energy.

Kazakhstan scores 24 out of 100, the global median sits at 27 — so this is 3 points below that line (higher means more cooked). Performance is lopsided: political polarization ranks worse than 36% of countries, while billionaires hoarded (8 billionaires) is the closest thing to a bright spot — and it still only beats 50% of the field. None of this is really about Kazakhstan specifically — it's about what's propping up the political institutions numbers underneath.

Sources: V-Dem + Global Peace Index (2025) · OECD Affordable Housing Database (HC1.2) (2024) · UN World Population Prospects / WHO (2024)

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